drchris May 4th, 2007
When love makes sacrifice a pleasure
Once again Mothers’ Day is just around the corner. The mass media is these days are full of advertisements on the various offers to celebrate this day. Many of us make elaborate plans to celebrate the day in ways unique and special to us. Expensive gifts and grandeur banquets are common ways of commemorating this auspicious day dedicated to our mothers.
Amidst all the celebrations and joy let us go back in time to relive the days we spent with her. She gave birth do us, fed us, took care of all our needs as helpless babies, supported us during school going days, then as young men and women, was a maid to take care of our kids and keep our house.
Now she may be healthy and fit, striken with illness of various sorts, bed-ridden, terminally ill or she may even in her death bed waiting for a last glimpse of the children she loved so much. Some of our mothers could also be dead and gone. Whatever her state she may be in let us reflect a little on our lives with this extra-ordinary creature of God who was a servant of sorts to us throughout her life.
We make a lot of sacrifices for advancements in our lives but often we do them for a reward. There is only one person who enjoys sacrificing her time and energy as it is done for the real love for the other person. Undeniably it is none other than our own mother. For this special person, her immeasurable love for us makes her sacrifice a pleasure not pain.
As kids we did not realize all her sacrifices as our vision was masked by her love for us. It takes a long time, sometimes even 50 long years, to really appreciate all the sacrifices that our mother has done and is continuing to do for us. When we were young we took all her sacrifices her for granted. Only now that we are ourselves parents, wives and mothers we begin to truly appreciate the fine qualities of the love and affection our mothers had for us.
In the early days there were many children in the family and it was a real wonder how our mother could take care of all of them equally well. Every one of us was equal in her eyes although the weakest did get some special privileges as far as food was concerned.
We can recollect the sleepless nights she spent taking care of us when we were sick, the moments of anxiety she went through when we were involved in some accidents and the tears she shed during their intense prayers for our recovery. All she lived for was for the well being of our future not hers. She did all that without any ulterior motive that one day we will repay that gratitude in cash or kind.
Today being parents ourselves, we understand insurmountable the pain and anxiety she would have endured when we suffered from all forms of ailments and failures in their lives. We realize the severity of the heartache we would caused her when we refused to heed her advice and meet disaster as a result.
In those days cooking was a real chore without all the modern gadgets we have today. Everything from grinding to cutting was done manually and you can imagine the difficulties encountered in preparing at least 3 meals a day for an extended family of over 10 people daily without fail. This has to be done with the meager income of their husbands who were the sole bread winners.
Apart from being a great mother to us she was an exemplary wife especially in those days when men were very over-demanding. We would agree that most of our fathers, however high and mighty, are totally dependent on mom for their successes. It is a fact that many men in advanced age do not survive long after the death of their views.
Sadly today many of her sacrifices are not appreciated by us, the children, which really hurts her to the core. Many of us simply forget the good old days when she toiled endlessly without sleep and rest for our well being, to make us what we are today. We are too busy with our own lives that we forget to spend time just talking and listening to her.
Among the siblings, we become calculative of who should take care and provide for her especially when she is left all alone after the death of her husband, our father. When she becomes ill or handicapped we conveniently pass the responsibility of caring for her to others. We give the excuse we are too busy and have no time and money.
Many of our mothers are now elderly and may be riddled with so many ailments. They are living in fear of loneliness at the twilight of their lives. The only companion they had, their husbands are gone.
We may not be able to cure all her illnesses, but the least we can give her is reassurance that we care and love her. We easily forget the days when as children, her loving embrace could allay all our fears. She did that willingly and with great love and passion.
Let’s not forget that our mother, in whatever state she may be, is our responsibility to care and love. We cannot and should not run away from that obligation of ours. It is not our money, gifts and food that she yearns for but for something priceless - our company, reassurance and love.
To a mother there is nothing more comforting than to see her children in good health and happiness. As children if we can convince her that she was the source and inspiration for our success and happiness in life, she would be the happiest mother today.
Happy Mothers’ Day
Dr.Chris Anthony
